Mastering the Bottle Blond… or Red.

Back in days of yore, when I had a full time job and my husband and I lived in the same city, I relished my 2-3 hour long salon cut and color experiences. Every 7 weeks I was in for a trim and a full color, sometimes with highlights. Cost? About $250 each visit. Not as bad as some places, I know, but a luxury nonetheless.

Not happening now. My last haircut was about 8 weeks ago, at the “Trade Secret” place in my local mall. $40 bucks for the cut, and Rachel did a pretty good job. I mean, my hair is long, and layered. It’s not a complicated cut, and I would do it myself if I weren’t positive that I would lose 7-8 inches in the process of evening the sides out.

Coloring, on the other hand, is right up my alley. I’ve always done my own, up until what’s known as “The Great Kool Aid Incident of 2005”. I didn’t dye with Kool Aid, but the end result was a color somewhere between Fruit Punch and Grape. That took 5 hours to undo. I still shudder.

I’ve been back on the horse for about 4 colors now, and everything’s fine. Here’s a few tips on how to successfully home color, without children’s beverage results:

1. Find the oldest, rattiest towel and T-shirt you have, and designate them your color clothes. Cut the T-shirt down the middle of the front and fasten with safety pin. There’s nothing worse than going to rinse and realizing that you can’t get your shirt over your head.
2. Clear the area around and underneath you. Color is drippy. It gets everywhere, and it stains. Move your bathmat, take your shoes off, and don’t bump into your shower curtain or decorative towels. And – use the gloves, unless you like purple hands.
3. Read the instructions. Yeah, I know you’re smart, but do it anyway. It’s your hair, you don’t want to fuck it up too bad.
4. Apply Vaseline to your hairline.This will prevent the dye from staining your skin.
5. If you have a lot of hair, use 2 bottles. If you try to go light on the solution, you will end up with uneven results, usually that the bottom layer of your hair does not get color.
6. Leave the product on your hair according to the instructions, then leave it on a little longer. My Loreal Excellence Red Penny box suggested 35 minutes. I left it on for an hour and 20 minutes. I go that long because my hair has been colored so many times, and due to the constant Florida sun, it’s a little dry. It turned out fine.
7. Don’t feel like you have to buy the most expensive, or fanciest home color kit. Most will pick up the highlights you already have, providing a multi-dimensional look. Excellence does, at $7.99 per kit, as opposed to Feria, at almost $20.
8. Condition, condition, condition, then trim. Most home kits are ammonia free, but coloring is still harsh. Color before a cut, and make the most of the conditioner included in the kit. (Tip: I’ve heard that the included conditioners are as strong as the hydrating treatments offered at salons.)
9. If you plan on hitting the tanning bed, or the beach, COVER YOUR HAIR. Your hair needs sunscreen just like your skin. If you’re coloring it, it’s going to be more porous and prone to damage. Cover it up, or it will start to fade and lighten.
10. If possible, enlist the help of a friend. You can take turns. It’s especially helpful if you have long hair, to ensure that you get even coverage in the back.

That’s it! Don’t be afraid! It’s nice and easy! (Rim shot…)